Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Guess What????

I have been tagged! It is the first for my blog and really I am much happier than I should be over this. I am just excited because it means at least one person reads my blog, yippie! So a great big thanks goes to my fellow Momto2boys for being a reader and my first tagger! Thanks lady!

So here is how it works:
First, share 7 facts about yourself.
Next, tag 7 people at the end of your blog by leaving their name and a link to their blog.
Last, let them know they're tagged by leaving a link in their blog.

Here are my 7 in no particular order:

1. I love to copy dance moves from videos. Not that I think I can really do them because I am nothing close but every since I can remember I have busted a move to videos. Good thing MTV barely plays videos anymore!

2. I love celebrity gossip! I read the magazines, websites, ETV daily. Not all three daily but at least one of the three daily.

3. I love Britney Spears, I know she sucks ass as a mom and has flipped completely out but I still think she has a kick ass body. I always find her songs catchy and end up downloading them!

4. I totally over use exclamation marks in all of my internet writings. I do it in emails, post on my baby board and obviuosly my blogs. I love the look of them because they look cheerful!!!! The more the merrier!!

5. My sister is really not my biological sister, we have connected souls and have a commonlaw sisterhood. She has supported me through the toughest times in my life and I have helped her through hers. We have had the best times of our lives with each other. I don't like to minimize our relationship by calling her a best friend because that doesn't scratch the surface of our relationship. I would die for her.

6. I love that my neice flips her toes the same way I do. Now when I do it I think about her sweet little face and it makes me smile at the thought of my princess.

7. I am funny, seriously people tell me that I have a quick sense of humor. I love to laugh and I love when people around me laugh!

Here are the people I am tagging:

1. Sherry

2. Kim

3. Annalisa

4. Lauren

5. Jess

6. Liza

7. Kattie

Whew, that was tough, I feel a little weird tagging people, it is kind of a reach out there. I feel like I did when I hosted my first grow up party. I was so nervous I got plastered before anyone showed up because I was nervous no one would hmmm that could of went under one of my 7 things! Ok I replace the Britney comment with my nervousness before any kind of function I host, whether it is family gatherings, kids parties, girls night out or parties. I don't know where the fear of being stood up comes from, I have never been stood up but I always think the possibility is there!

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Internet Friends

I have been a member of an online community for years now. I joined when I was pregnant with Kye, he is 3 so about 4 years. Today I met one of the girls at the park with our kids. It was a good time and felt comfortable because we have been interacting on the internet so long. I must admit there was a quick second when I pulled up that I was a little nervous because I think about how it is so easy to post a lot of crazy stories on our board and for a split second I was worried. Then I remembered that she has read all of those stories and still wanted to meet me! So I was reassured. While we were at the park a guy asked if our kids were related or just pals. Simple question right.....but both of us just kinda froze for a minute and then she was able to say well were pals so that makes them pals. It was just a little awkward to say ummm we are virtual friends meeting for the first time. So my question........ Is the internet a common way to meet friends or is it still a little odd for mainstream society? My friend met her husband online but she was so embarassed to tell people that she met him at the beach. I think talking to a random stranger on the beach ad exchanging numbers and whatever else is not any more or less respectable than getting to know someone online and then meeting them.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Easy Come Easy Go

So yesterday at work my supervisor comes over and says that we got a $10,000 donation to the agency from an elderly gentleman and said he also gave some blackberries. I was really excited thinking wow I hope I am in the line up for a blackberry. Our conversation went as follows:

Me:(excitedly) Wow, that is great, what are they doing with the blackberries?

Her: Oh they are nice ones, really big.

Me: (persistantly) So how are they giving them out?

Her: Well we decided so that the whole agency gets to benefit from them we are making Blackberry Cobbler and bringing in ice cream for a social tomorrow afternoon.

Me: (disappointedly) Oh sorry I will be out of the office tomorrow and miss it.

It still was nice of the man to give the donation but I was dreaming a little to big!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Momma Didn't Raise No Quitter

Well here it goes, I must break you guys into my I hate my body and need to exercise routine. I go through this about every 2 weeks. I have wanted to keep it away from you guys and spare you the boredom. I just think we are getting to know each other a little better, I am loving this blogging thing so it is time I tell you as I do all my real life friends, family, co-workers, gas station attendants and any strangers on the street that will listen.......I am going on a diet, I have to do something. I am not comfortable in my own skin. What diet you ask well I have tried everything from the horrible cabbage soup diet, Atkins, calorie tracking, herbal life, slim fast, south beach and weight watchers. I use the term tried loosely because some of them have been like 4 hour diets so not a real try. Last year I talked my friend into just trying the atkins for a kick start, she has since lost 36 pounds and looks wonderful. I didn't lose, in fact I think I found some of her lost weight for her but again I only lasted a week before cheating here and there. So today I started the Atkins diet, good bye carbs and sugar. I know that Atkins is not a healthy life change (I have even used that excuse to stop doing it before) but I need a quick start to get motivated. I am also going to get moving, I am not going to lie to myself and set unrealistic goals of going to the gym 5 days a week, that is just not in the schedule. Instead I plan on doing a exercise video at least 4 nights a week. I have several random ones laying around the house so I will just do what I feel like at the time. After all at this point any exercise will help. Then once I see some sort of results and start somewhat feeling connected with exercise then I can transition into more of a healthy lifestyle and build the habit of healthy eating choice. So after many attempts I am back in the saddle and not giving up!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Do Not Call Here

I have a great time responding to telemarketers. It is the next best thing to pranking people and since caller id has pretty much ruined that, I resort to tormenting poor little telemarketers. I have had some really funny conversations and I am sure I really irritate a couple of them. One time I answered a call from a telemarketer claiming I won a free 3 night hotel stay. I asked if we could break it down to hour increments because that is all my husband and I would need is periodic hour visits. The girl actually transferred me to her supervisor and of course I was told that was not possible. I think the girl might of got laughed at because she called me back mad and said that was a great joke. My newest gig I learned from my sister, when I see it is a telemarketer I tell Kye that spongebob or Dora is on the phone and of course he talks their ear off and don't let them get a word in edge wise and they end up hanging up on him. oh it cracks me up but as funny as I think it all is I am tormented by one particular place. The one that tells you your car warrenty is running out, it is an annoying recording and it calls me everywhere. I get at least one a day at home and at least once a week at work. they find me where ever I am. The other day at work I was walking past an interview room and the phone was ringing so I picked it up and yup you guessed it, Car Warranty Fairy! Almost enough to make me want to sign the do not call list but I can not let them win, I have to much fun with it all!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Mommy Sick Day

So do Mommy sick days exist? I ask because I went to the doctor today because my throat is sore and there were white spots on my tonsils. Yes you guessed it I have strep throat so the doctor gave me a prescription for an antibiotic and told me to take 24 hours off work. I seriously had to talk myself into coming home because I would be with the boys all day. I knnow that sounds bad but we just had 3 days together in which we went to the movies, went to the beach, went shopping, played in the hose and they were still bored on any down time. I know the whole day in the house is going to drive them crazy!!! I took my chances and came on home and right now I have Noggin babysitting Kye and Kastan is really into reading "The Call of the Wild" so I am able to at least chill out on the couch. I am hoping we get to sneak in a nap, I am really tired! Keith is out of town tonight so it will be Kid Cuisines for dinner.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Space Chimps

So yesterday it was close to a million degrees outside so we took the boys to see that movie Space Chimps. It is always a gamble taking Kye to the movies because sometimes he will watch it and other times he eats his popcorn and then wants to bounce! Yesterday was good, we started off with a friendly game of air hockey between Kastan and Kye unfortunately the table was malfunctioning and wouldn't give Kastan credit for his scores but he was ok with that and it didn't cause a meltdown. Have I ever told you how compassionate and laid back Kastan is? He really rolls with the punches and I appreciate it soooo much! The movie was good both of them liked it and even I did. I laughed out loud a couple of times. Monkeys are just cute anyways; who doesn't like them? So a good day for everyone and we survived the heat!

Friday, July 18, 2008

As a mother to boys

Never in a million years would I think I would be doing and saying some of things I have since becoming the mother of boys. I have been asked some crazy questions like "Mommy why does my worm (worm being his penis, thanks Grandma) just keep getting bigger and bigger" "Mommy how did you get such big muscles?" The muscle questions was directed at my vuluputious breast so it could of almost been a compliment in a sense cause hey let's face it there was a time when they were barely noticeable by anyone! Being the mother to boys I realized men/boys can pee on their head, don't know that I would ever really want to but having the option would be kinda cool! Today though I did something that is far different then those silly things as a mother to boys.......I caught Jelly Fish. Might not sound like a big deal but I am a big chicken about anything involving any animals. I mean I am afraid of most dogs, petrified of snakes and any other animals. To help you better understand I will share a story with you. One time I was driving with the boys and there was a turtle in the road. I decide to stop and Kastan asks if we can take it home and let it lose in the water at our house. Well we get out and I tell him to put it in this box. Well that was a disaster because he was scared and I couldn't do it and just to leave I had to get in the passengers side and crawl over because I didn't even want to walk beside the turtle. You would of thought it was a ninja turtle! So after hearing that imagine my pride as I caught 4 jelly fish in a bucket. I am from the midwest so I didn't realize all the hassle they can cause but they can sting you. People around her just get them out of the water, bury them in the sand and go on about their way. Today I was the cool mom getting them out so the boys could examine them and bury them!!!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Girls Trip Canceled

So every year my sister and I go on a girls trip to just have a fun time and leave the men and kids at home. We like to bask in the sun and drink our faces off. It really is the charge of my batteries to keep me going in this hectic life. Well this years trip has been canceled and I couldn't be happier. It was canceled because my sister is PREGNANT!!! I am so happy for her, she has a 3 year old ballerina princess so this addition to their family will be great. I am excited beyond words and so happy for her and her husband. I can not wait to see how great of a big sister my niece will be! I can't wait to hear the name they pick out, I can't wait to see if they are having a boy or girl, I can't wait to see her pregnant belly and to tell my sons that they are going to have another cousin! I have to get my list of names together, problem is I like not so common names and she likes common names! Hmmm guess I will just have to see what she decides! Congratulations Sherry, i can't wait to meet our new family member!!!

Monday, July 14, 2008

When I Grow Up.......

When I grow up I want to be just like my sister Sherry. She is truely the most selfless, giving person I have ever met. I have seen her bend over backwards to help family in so many ways, whether it is money, acting as a taxi, babysitting or just offering a shoulder to cry on. I have seen here give to strangers, for instance one year the hotel she was working for was switching the bedding and so they sold the current bedding, she bought 50 sets and then took them to a homeless shelter and gave them away. She won a pay it forward contest on the radio and continued to pay it forward by giving 5 people $100.00 asking them to continue paying it forward by giving someone $20.00.
Recently she was involved in an incident where some juveniles threw rocks off a bridge and hit her 4 day old Chevy Avalanche. She was really shook up because her husband had to serve off the road and her 3 year old was in the car. It was just a scarey incident for everyone, my BIL had recently returned from Iraq so his intial thought was they were being shot at. Today she had the mediation with the 8 year old and his mother. The little boy told how the 14 year old he was with talked him into it. He said he knew it was wrong but the older boy told him to do it. Instead of demanding they pay her deductible my sister took out a shiney stone she has had for many years and said I am going to give you this rock and i want you to carry it with you, when older kids tell you to throw rocks or do bad things I want you to hold onto this rock and have the courage to do the right thing. The mediator asked if she was sure she didn't want her money and Sherry said yes I am sure, I just want him to think about what he does. I really think she made an impression on this little boy and his family. She said that the mother was emotional and very open in the mediation.
Just knowing her makes me want to be a better person, makes me want to grow up and be just like her!!

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Ladies Night

Well last night I met up with a group of girls from work at a local mexican resturant for great food, drinks, dancing and of course karoke. It was a really great time from what I remember. I set out on a mission to drink and for some reason I thought it was up to prove to everyone I am a hard core drinker and had to drink more draft beer than anyone else there. I think it comes from my complex of not being able to drink the pretty, fruity, girly drinks. They cause indigestion (yeah that souds sexy now doesn't it?) and make me miserable, beer on the other hand makes me a great singer, dancer and comedian! So I drink eough to decide I would do a duet with my great friend Sandy. She mentions Pink and I am like oh yeah I love that song, Pill. I only liked it because when Kastan was 3 he would sing it at the top of his lungs. I forgot I hadn't heard it since then and probably would not know the words. So they finally call our names and as soon as they hand me the mike I look over and my dear husband walked in, just in time to watch his wife make a slapped ass out of herself! Well of course we were the two that misses the first couple of lines and continue to sing in a mumble tone until the course comes on, then we belted that out like true rockstars. For some reason after our act they took a break and played some dance music. I had to get my groove on and show everyone I still got it. I dropped it like it was hot a couple of times but was fearful some one would have to come over and help me pick it back up! I did go against my numero uno dance rule and participated in the Cupid Shuffle and Cha Cha Slide. The group only had to push me out of the way a couple of times! I must say I needed a fun night and was glad we did it even though I felt like I was hit by a bus this morning! Of course I have pictures of the night and couldn't wait to share them with you guys!

Mandatory Fun

So how does an exciting well planned adventure turn into a stressed out Momma pulling her hair out and screaming we are having fun whether you like it or not. I will help you understand. Yesterday I took my boys and my 8 year old neice to the Air and Space Center. It was about an hour drive in which Kye asked me 3261 times if he could ride a space rocket, the older two disagreed on everything they talked about. I hit a drive through on the way there because I knew things would be way overpriced. That was a mess in itself just trying to get them to eat their food and not re-upholster the car in fries and nuggets. Well we finally make it there and the older two would run up to the exhibts and just push every possible button. They didn't read what was going on but would ask me every question about what was going on. I had to tell them to read afterall I had no clue myself, at times they think I am a walking enclypedia (huh kids look I can't even spell enclypedia) and should have all the answers. Then Kastan decides he is afraid of everything, they had a lot of cool exhibts that involved entering a little movie showing and my sweet boy that asks to watch movies like I am legend was afraid of movies at the Air and Space Center, I mean really. Then Kye, my little fire cracker, I believe he was channeling his inner camel because he asked for something to drink every 30 steps. I think he was trying to store water for a trip across the desert and expected him to leave with a hump in the middle of his back. So by the 6000th drink, the pleading to just go to the gift shop and dragging my 7 year old in a plane to watch a movie in which I directed him to go ask some of the 3 year olds for reassurance if he was that scared I think I almost lost my mind! I had to explain we were there to have fun and there were not going to be an exceptions, everyone was gonna have fun. I did get some good pictures so of course I will share them with you guys!!

Friday, July 11, 2008

Missing Link

So I know as working mother I complain (alot) about all that I do, how early my days start, how I leave work then start my second job as a mother and how late my nights are but you know what I love it! I became aware of it this week. Wednesday my husbands parents picked up the boys from their day care provider and took them camping. It was a relief getting off work and not having to rush, DH and I went to dinner. We ate peacefully had a beer, adult conversation, it was heaven. We came home and got to have crazy adult time without fear of being heard. It was nice, I totally enjoyed it but then it was lonely. The house was quiet, I didn't have to say quit fighting with your brother at any time but it was lonely. I could go to bed anytime I wanted with only bathing myself but it was so lonely. When I finally did go to bed I missed my boys like crazy. There was definetly a missing link in our little family. They come home today and I am so excited, I can't wait to hear their stories and I can't wait to hug their little bodies! Tonight will be cuddle and snuggle time! Now don't get me wrong Mama needs her breaks and I have been on girls trips with out them, away from them for business trips but being in our housewithout them was a lonely feeling. As a result of this you guys are gonna get an aray of random pictures of my little men!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Pretty Hurts

You see that thing over there? That is the Ped Egg and has quickly become my best friend. It is a handy little contraption that helps you reach the goal of soft feet. It resembles a cheese grater and comes with an egg shaped cover that catches all the shavings of dead skin. I didn’t realize how much I obsessed with feet until I read Dena’s blog on her foot fetish. Now I wouldn’t go as far as to call mine a fetish; I think I am still in the obsession state. Anyways I realized how much I use my Ped Egg one morning when my dear husband yells out babe were running late we don’t have time for you to shave your feet. I don’t think he realizes that the amount of goodies found in the Ped Egg helps me judge the day’s worth. A lot means good productive day a little means slow drawn out day. Ok not really but I do feel better the days I am able to attack my feet with my egg! Soft feet used to never be an issue for me, I always had soft feet. I am trying to reflect back on the cause of this problem and I have it narrowed down to two possible causes. The first one is pregnancy; I mean I did manage to gain a whooping 60 pounds with each child, that couldn’t be good on the feetsies. I do fall back on that pregnancy excuse for far to many of my bodies dysfunction so I think I will let it off the hook and go with my second cause…………sassy shoes. This makes sense to me because when I was in the Army I had no choice but to wear big ugly combat boots but I always received compliments on my feet, even from the pedicurist. Now that I am required to wear fabulous shoes on a daily basis my feet are paying the price. Another piece of evidence to back up my theory see this beautiful girl here. That is my sister Sherry; she has a shoe collection that can make grown women fall to their knees in envy. One small problem, she has gator sticks to shove in them. Ok not really gator sticks but they are a little under the weather, I love you Sherry. I think this is all the evidence I need to prove fabulous shoes, damaged feet but remember ladies pretty hurts!

Monday, July 7, 2008

It's a doctor, It's a plane, No It's Kye

I really love 3 year olds. They are so funny without even trying or sometimes even when they try. Kye made his first attempt at a joke the other day as we were waiting to pick up DH. A crazy looking man comes out and Kye yells "There's Daddy, turn around Daddy come this way" and then he busted out laughing. Of course I laughed, that was a huge mistake because then he continued saying that to each and every person that passed and of course he expected me to erupt in laughter each time. Alright kid it was funny the first time, not so much the 6000th time, try something new. So he has also taken to changing his name. Last week he was airplane, if you wanted his attention you had to say Airplane. If you made the mistake of calling him Kye he would correct you with "I not Kye, I Airplne". If you didn't make the correction he would repeat this until you did or he fell asleep. This week he is doctor. I tried using Doc but he wouldn't go for it, I explained that cool doctors go by Doc but he wasn't down for it. I can't wait to see what we progress to next but I am sure it will be something just as creative and funny because 3 year olds are great!

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Four Tens

Because of high gas prices my work has given us the option to fork 4 ten hour days. Thinking of my all the extra time I would be able to spend with my boys I jumped all over it. Now the day before my first 10 hour day I am getting a little nervous. This means I will have to be out the door with them by 6:15 in the morning. We already do a mad morning dash to get out the door so to prevent a more ragged morning I will need to be organized. I take my boys to an in home daycare provider so they can come over in pajama's, that is great. I will just pack their bags the night before. Although the days will start early and last long I am so excited for the three day weekends. The first Friday off Grandma and Grandpa will have the boys out camping so I will drive out there and spend the day doing water activities. I have a Friday planned with girl friends at the beach with all of our kids. As far as saving gas it probably is not gonna work but it will add fun to our summer!!!

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Picture Problems

I do not know what is going on with my family but for some reason my boys will not take a normal picture. If I take pictures individually it sometimes works out but when I try to get them togehter you can forget it. One will be looking away, have a half smile or eyes shut. It is driving me crazy. Yesterday we went with my in-laws to watch fireworks from their boat. It was a nice time having all of the family together but I didn't get any pictures that are good. Here is a couple to prove my point.

Friday, July 4, 2008

Independence Day

Happy 4th of July everyone! As Americans everywhere celebrate the nations independence with hotdogs, hamburgers, boating, swimming and firewroks I thought I would take this oppurtunity to reflect on some of my time in the Army. I joined the Army in 1994 on a whim. I was out of high school working at the local grocery store. I didn't think there was much of a future there but I really wasn't sure how to go aboout changing it. Then an awkward, dorky Army recruiter came through the line and my bagger made a joke that I wanted to join the Army and there the conversation began. I left for basic training a month later. It was my first airplane ride ever, my ears were going crazy and I couldn't hear a thing. I finally made it to Alabama where I meet up with a couple other people headed to FT McCellan. We load a bus for an hour bus ride and get on base about midnight. We go through in-processing and finally get to go to the barracks about 1:30 am. A girl shows us our bunks and it reminds me of a girls home, I am scared and just want to go home. Instead I hang in there finish in-processing by getting tons of shots, uniforms and equipment. A couple of days later it is time to go to our companies and offically begin basic training. They call the intial meeting of your drill sergeants, shark attack. It is like you see in the movies only worse. They come on the bus welcome you to the company and then the yelling begins. You have to scramble to get you and all your bags off the bus, you have a ruck sack on your back, a duffle bag on your front and any civilan bags in your arms. You go through the drill sergeants telling you to pick them up, put them down, get over here go back over there, do push-ups, get up, get down, tell them your name, do flutter kicks, get back up, get back down, pick up the bags. It went on for a long time, I was tired. There were people quitting and crying. I instantly recognized the fact that their life got worse as they admitted to wanting to quit so the smart girl I was I kept my mouth shut and tried to blend in with the other miserable people as to not draw attention to my self. That only lasted so long because of course I would make the dreadful mistake of saying I belonged to platoon number 3 instead of third platoon. I still really don't know the difference but that one small statement made the drill sergeants angry enough to kick me out of the platoon and make me march back to the barracks by myself. I made it through that night and went on to gradute 16 weeks later as a military police. My first duty station was Japan, I spent 2 years there as a garrison MP working law enforcement. I have so many funny stories from there like the first time I went to pull someone over by myself and they wouldn't pull over. I was right on their tail getting ready to call in the high speed chase that was about to ensue when I realized I never turned on my lights. Yeah I was that private, full of entertainment for the outside world. After spending two years there I realized I kind of liked this Army thing and started competeing in soldier of the month and quater boards. I was good at them and won a lot of them. My picture was up at the PX for a whole quater because I won soldier of the quater for the whole post. My reward was the honor of carrying the post colors on a run hmmmm I would of settled for a day off! I spent my first holidays away from home by myself in Japan. It was sad and lonely, you hang out with friends but it is not the all. I did win the barracks door decorating contest at Christmas time. I made a christmas tree out of garland and decorated it with real lights and real balls and presents. My next duty station was FT Bragg North Carolina, completely different than Japan. FT Bragg is home to some of the toughest, hard core soldiers in the Army. It is a totally different world where you spend time preparing for deployments and training in the field. My time there was the toughest physically. There were pt smoke sessions, ruck marches and long runs. Field exercises were long, extremely hot or extremely cold. I learned so much in such a short period. My company deployed to Bosnia for 9 months. We came back and that is when I was promoted to Sergeant and decided to re-enlist for Hawaii. Living in Hawaii was great, it was as beautiful as you can imagine. I met my husband there, I had my first son there. I left the Army there. I chose to dedicate my time to my sweet baby boy. We moved back to North Carolina and I missed the Army. I got called back to active duty for a training batallion when my son was about a year old. I was then a trainer for reserve units deploying to Iraq and Afganistan. The hardest class I ever gave was to my dear husband's company who was getting ready to leave. The hardest thing I ever did was tell my husband bye as he was heading off to war. My son missed his dad and I missed my best friend. He was gone for a year. About 2 months after he got back we found out I was pregnant again. As a family we decided to get out, it was hard enough with one child but we couldn't do it with two children so we both got out of the Army. I respect those families continuing to make the sacrifices for our country and I think you for your service and dedication. Happy Birthday America!

The only picture I have on the computer of my Army days is one a friend posted on my myspace comments and I wanted to share it here. This is when we first got to Bosnia and a company of about 180 people was staying in a hanger while they figured out what missions we would have.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Paper or Plastic?

Neither, how about a tote for shopping! A friend of mine posted this in an online community I am a part of. It really made me think about how I can do something small for the good of the Earth. I mean something as small as giving up plastic bags can make an impact. About a month ago I went to science day at Virginia Institute of Marine Science and won a Trader Joe's grocery tote. I didn't really listen to everything the girl was telling me about plastic bags but now I am closer to caring and getting it! The best part for me is the effect it could have on oil. I am so over our countries dependency on oil from other countries. So from here on out this family will just say no to plastic bags. Think of small changes you can make, if you can't think of a changbe feel free to give up plastic bags!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008


I seriously feel like I am going to win a big jackpot in the lottery. I don't play consistently but I do play at least once a month. Everytime I buy a ticket I fantasize about the people I would help. Of course I would help my family but I always think of how nice it would be to help random people in my life out. For example I stop every morning at a particular gas station for a soda and would love to pay the ladies house off for her and her 2 girls. There is a lady at work that is raising her two children by herself and doing a great job, I would love to pay her house off for her also. I mostly think about people I could pay their houses off because I think about how much easier my life would be if I didn't have a stupid mortgage payment. So after all this dreaming when I check my numbers the next morning I feel a big sense of disappointment because I truly think I have the winning ticket in my hand. What would you do if you won a big jackpot, do you even think about winning?

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

The Most Painfullest Thing

Oh today was a hard day in Mommyhood for me. Kastan had his big dentist appointment in which he had 8 teeth pulled and a cavity filled. The dentist office is absolutely fantastic, it is a new practice so they really are very accommodating. I hope this continues in the future. We get checked in and I pay the out of pocket expense of $400.00, insurance is a whole other issue for me but I am trying to get past all that. As were called back I am surprised that they allow both me and my 3 year old to go back with them. As we settle in to the room I look at my sweet boy nervously look around at all the tools. I can see the fear in his face so I start small talk with him. I start to feel a little twinge of something but really put it to the side. The dentist walks in, he is an tall, older quiet man but I get a sense of comfort with him in the room. He lowers the seat back and down and explains what he is going to do to Kastan. The first thing he does is explain the tool that will be used to hold his mouth open and gives a practice run. Kastan yells out in pain and my mommy ears perk up. It is time to get started with the numbing process and Kastan is in pain. Kastan has a high level of pain tolorence so when I hear him crying I know it is painful for him. The dentist has to keep going and I hear a muffled moan coming from my sweet innocent child. I felt like my insides were being ripped out. I seriuosly thought I was going to jump on the dentist to make him stop hurting my little boy. I started sweating and felt light headed. I was sick to my stomach and thought I might throw up. Of course I cried, I cry over everything. Kastan was still crying and moan but I could hear he was trying to control it. I saw him flexing his feet and squeezing his hands. I really wanted it all to stop all of this continued for 45 mins as the dentist pulled out 8 teeth and filled the cavity. When it was finally over the dentist states that Kastan did an exceptional job and he was impressed with his behavior. As soon as we get the follow up care instructions and the ok to leave I look at my baby boy and know just what to say to make it all better, "I'm taking you to Game Stop!" His eyes lights up and he trie to say alright but his face is still so numb. I couldn't help but get him 2 games for his PSP, he really went through a lot. On the way home Kastan says out of the blue, Mom I love you. That was the most painfullest thing I ever went through so far in my life. I said "Me too buddy!"