The Most Painfullest Thing

Oh today was a hard day in Mommyhood for me. Kastan had his big dentist appointment in which he had 8 teeth pulled and a cavity filled. The dentist office is absolutely fantastic, it is a new practice so they really are very accommodating. I hope this continues in the future. We get checked in and I pay the out of pocket expense of $400.00, insurance is a whole other issue for me but I am trying to get past all that. As were called back I am surprised that they allow both me and my 3 year old to go back with them. As we settle in to the room I look at my sweet boy nervously look around at all the tools. I can see the fear in his face so I start small talk with him. I start to feel a little twinge of something but really put it to the side. The dentist walks in, he is an tall, older quiet man but I get a sense of comfort with him in the room. He lowers the seat back and down and explains what he is going to do to Kastan. The first thing he does is explain the tool that will be used to hold his mouth open and gives a practice run. Kastan yells out in pain and my mommy ears perk up. It is time to get started with the numbing process and Kastan is in pain. Kastan has a high level of pain tolorence so when I hear him crying I know it is painful for him. The dentist has to keep going and I hear a muffled moan coming from my sweet innocent child. I felt like my insides were being ripped out. I seriuosly thought I was going to jump on the dentist to make him stop hurting my little boy. I started sweating and felt light headed. I was sick to my stomach and thought I might throw up. Of course I cried, I cry over everything. Kastan was still crying and moan but I could hear he was trying to control it. I saw him flexing his feet and squeezing his hands. I really wanted it all to stop all of this continued for 45 mins as the dentist pulled out 8 teeth and filled the cavity. When it was finally over the dentist states that Kastan did an exceptional job and he was impressed with his behavior. As soon as we get the follow up care instructions and the ok to leave I look at my baby boy and know just what to say to make it all better, "I'm taking you to Game Stop!" His eyes lights up and he trie to say alright but his face is still so numb. I couldn't help but get him 2 games for his PSP, he really went through a lot. On the way home Kastan says out of the blue, Mom I love you. That was the most painfullest thing I ever went through so far in my life. I said "Me too buddy!"